Speak to me

May pictures 020

 

 

The conversation felt lonely.

Like she had been abandoned after every sentence.

Feeling foolish after every question.

Because questions had become evidence of weakness somehow – admitting what she didn’t know.

She needed to feel that click.

That piercing, ringing bell.

That clear, resounding note of understanding between souls that can only be heard on the frequency of compassion.

She was tempted to keep silent.

Because silence would rescue her from the abandonment of no response.

But silence would also hand deliver her to isolation – which fades into detachment – which is only retreating’s better side, and retreating was not an option.

So she decided to speak anyhow.

Even if it was only to herself.

She needed to hear someone’s voice.

She needed to hear an answer, but not for the sake of the question.

She needed to hear an answer to remind herself that she still existed.

So she began to tell herself stories out loud.

Soothed by the resonance of her own voice inside her chest.

Finding that inside of these stories that she’d tell herself, what she had really found was her own voice.

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29 thoughts on “Speak to me

  1. I thought I was the only one who felt empowered by hearing my own voice. Not that I do not enjoy the sound of others…I do love hearing others very much!….but when I hear my own voice the thoughts in my head don’t seem that silly anymore. Thank you for sharing this with all of us. 🙂

  2. Excellent piece! And the way you organise your texts fits this one perfectly. I could feel these slightly awkward moments of silence between lines. To breathe in and out. To think over.
    Oh, not to mention I can’t take my eyes of these photographs.

  3. I love that you noticed the “awkward silences” – as you put it! Thank you so much!! And thank you for mentioning the photos. That’s been a really fun part of this process for me. 🙂

  4. Wow, Billie! Thank you so much! I just accepted my first Liebster Award a little over a week ago. I’m not sure that I can accept twice, but hearing that you appreciate this blog means the world to me!! I am honored that you would think to nominated me, and I always enjoy getting comments from you!

    You’ve made my day with this kindness! Thanks again my friend.

  5. ” . . . . silence would rescue her from the abandonment of no response.” Brilliant! And it is also our silence that protects us from receiving a negative response. If we never step out, we can never be shot at. But that isn’t living. Let your wonderful voice be heard! Excellent piece!

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